Totally Loopy

Yesterday with mild sedation, which means you're awake....you just don't give a shit, an alien was implanted in my chest.  You feel the needles sink into your chest and pray it has time to work when you hear the word "SCALPEL!"  Not to be confused with the alien on the right side of my chest that feels like lead disguised as silicone and, the 6 screws holding my jaw together.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bd9NgtwQcnw

A cardiac loop recorder.  Fortunately it doesn't take pictures or record voices.

 With a bag of lead, 6 screws and a loop recorder does that make me........fake, a bit loopy and screwed?

What I'm not good at

Page design.  I suck.  Can never get it the way I want it.  Other bloggers have great designs....mine is simple, very easy.  I obviously fried THAT part of the brain.

Because it's no help, whatsoever.... I couldn't even get the cat to look right.  Waiting for the light.

Fighting Fingerprints

The boys moved out long ago but, I am still fighting fingerprints....they're much higher on the wall but always around door/drawer handles.  On the last fingerprint scrubbing mission my brain turned on the light.  The light in the attic doesn't get turned on much but lately it's been coming on a lot.  Anyway I digress....how to conquer the fingerprints/smudges.  Cover the area.  My first thought was scrapbook paper but I didn't have enough of the right colors so I went through my fabric stash.  My  Longaberger Christmas Baskets are displayed in the kitchen so basically the colors are red,green and, white.

 

My first choice was a bright red background with yellow hibiscus but, it was too bright.  I found the right fabric in my Hawaiian stash.  I hated to use it but, it was worth it.  Took the handles off, cut fabric to fit the areas, modpodged the fabric on and varnished it the next day.  Voila!

Did this faux stained glass look in the 90's and am thinking it needs some red now.  Just haven't figured out exactly where I would put the red.

The clear spots is clear gallery glass so will experiment on whether I should cut it out and put red in or not.  Waiting for my brain to turn the light on again.

 The light was turned on as I was screwing handles back on and an image floated, somewhat hazily before my eyes.  PAINT!  I have to confess I started this sitting on the floor, trying to sketch it out, etc.  The light was slow....it finally dawned on me to remove the doors but, not until I wasn't able to move or get up from the floor without wanting to scream.  The hubby took the doors off when he got home.

Background is dark green, added the red flower bushes after I was done and it needed something more.  The bush actually started out small but it just kept growing.  I am pleased with the final result and think I will do the same thing to the island.

Come back for more adventures in FIGHTING FINGERPRINTS!

Up in Smoke

 Dear Santa, 

Since you check your list often you will know that I've been good.  Well pretty good, I did sneak downstairs a couple of time after the hubby asked me not to.  But, that's not really being bad and he wouldn't have known I did....if I hadn't left the light on.  His fear of finding me at the bottom when he comes home could be handled differently.  Like, put a large cushion at the bottom to break my fall, etc.  My old art room is down there, it calls me.

And just to warn you when you come this year, the 11 month old puppy STILL isn't housebroke so watch your step.  Just sayin....

Most of the cats will greet you, even the baby Mike Katz.  He's very friendly and loveable due to all the bonding during bottle feeding.  Don't make me come down and check your bag before you leave.

As you know I fried my laptop....again.  Sorry but, I use it a lot.  So if you decide to replace my smoldering heap of plastic...

I LOVE THIS!!!!! but, it's an HP and you know my relationships with Toshiba are much better and last longer.  So a plain black one is fine....there are always stickers or paint......paint, wow.... sorry my brain just left the building.

Just in case I will put up my super duper Christmas stocking.

♥  U Santa

Fridays sketch.......

I saw a cross stitch kit online Friday and loved the pic......but, I hate cross stitch.  I suck big time at cross stitching....and waitressing.  I actually can't draw that well either.  I go through a lot of erasers and the eraser droppings end up everywhere but, I really liked the pic.  So I sketched it.   And erased, sketched, erased......I'm sure you get it.

I'm not an adirondack chair fan, especially for drawing.  Next time they'll be sitting on the sand.  It appealed to me because it looks peaceful, stressless, perfect holiday.....sigh.....

Wingard Resort

This past summer I painted a sign for a friends cottage at Sandy Pines.  As always I sketched and experimented for weeks before finding the look I was comfortable with.  She asked for something whimsical but.....

no ideas came to me while sketching of anything whimsical.  Hibiscus flowers did.  Her sister lived with us on Oahu when she first moved to Hawaii until finding a job, apartment, etc.  Because of the Island weather the most amazing things grow in your yard that wouldn't last here in the north. 

Bananas, mangos, avocados, guava, bird of paradise, plumeria, hibiscus....the list goes on and that is when my obsession for the hibiscus first began.   So when my friend wanted 'The Wingard Resort' I automatically thought of the hibiscus flower.

Doesn't every resort have hibiscus bushes?  I pictured this with a spotlight shining on it

so every one could read what it says...

"WELCOME TO THE WINGARD RESORT

EST 2012

PROUDLY SERVING WHATEVER YOU BRING"

Hall Art

Thought I'd share some more of my art that I finally hung.....in the hall.  Where no one would see it unless they used.....the pink bathroom.  I don't miss the white walls at all.

The sunflowers was a result from the 2011 In The Sun e-class.  We were dared to do something we always wanted to do but didn't.  I wanted to do a painting with water soluble oil pastels.  I mod podged tissue down for texture which made it harder to blend the pastels.  Oil pastels are messy, you get it on everything and it has to be sealed or it will continue to get on everything.  I varnished it but, just in case I didn't get enough coats on it....be sure not to brush against it on your way to the pink bathroom.  Just sayin....

The only time the hubby and I had a Relay for Life team I painted 2 harbor pictures, one to auction off and one to keep.  I am a breast cancer survivor and wanted to give back to the community.  I loved doing it.  Getting walkers, raising donations, etc.  Walking the survivor lap with other cancer survivors was awesome and the illuminary ceremony was very touching.   Even though it was in July the nights were chilly and I ended up with bronchitis and never had a team since.  I try and go back for the survivor lap each year.

I saw a version of this on The Brave Girls website a while ago.  I'm not happy with it, it's missing something, I just don't know what.  So since I'm not done with it I haven't signed it.  Hung it any way hoping I would know what to do with it, what's missing.  You can see my first and only attempt at space....

My first collage.  Looking through mag after mag and seeing adds for Manolo Blahniks, designer clothes, etc the title came to me.  I even ran across a pic from Sarah Jessica Parker from the movie of the same name but, I think she got covered up.

Metal Plate I painted at many years ago  HOOT.

Retirement....What a lovely thought

Retirement....What a lovely thought but, am I ready for it?   You know your old when you start thinking of retiring.  In my case retiring from what?  Doctors?  Now there's a thought.  Retiring from a cold state, moving to a warmer one?  Haven't been able to work in 8 years because of health.   IDK....too tired to think about it.

After a month of sketching, erasing, erasing, sketching, erasing, clean new paper, sketching, erasing, sketching and on and on and on and on.......I  knew what I wanted to draw, I just couldn't get it right to my satisfaction.

Couldn't get the legs to look right, the arms were too skinny or too fat.  The hammock never looked right, gave up on bare feet.  In the end I do what I always do....make up my own species from Janie's Planet.

  Yup, you are looking at a pic of Janie's Planet where nothing is perfect.  People are not quite what you imagined, the flowers kind of look familiar, the trees resemble something you've seen in  Hawaii and Florida.

The sand on the beach is darker than what you're use to......

and the sailboats are scribbles.......crap, I forgot to put the easy as pie birds up in the sky...  Oh, well.  On Janie's Planet they're all at Meijer's parking lot looking for scraps.

Finally hung it up....

After 10 years of hiding it, I finally hung it up.  The painting I did after I found out I had cancer.  Gloom and doom I call it because that's how I felt.  The word Cancer terrifies me.  When they did the hysterectomy I was 2 steps from cancer then.  When the mammogram found the lump, didn't think much of it.  When they wanted a biopsy the fear started.  By the way, Christmas Eve is NOT a good time to have a biopsy but, I wasn't thinking.  Just wanted it to be over with.  Ruined Christmas for me, I was sore, scared and didn't feel like celebrating.  2 days after Christmas they told me I had breast cancer.  I failed to escape this time.  So  many emotions fill you and I painted to let them out.  It is now on the wall for anyone to see.

 Without flash....looks yellow.

 With flash it makes it look brighter than it is.

Out of hiding and on the wall.

Hall of Horrors

The HALL OF HORRORS  is gone replaced with my art horrors and some family pics.  I ran the wallpaper & border down the one side and started to paint the opposite side....white...again.  My brain rebelled.  It said lets match the color in the wallpaper!  Again the color my brain sent me did not match the final color.  Whatever.  It will have to deal with it.  So instead of mauve/dark pink.....I got

Pepto Bismal Pink.  The light tones it down so it doesn't look so...PINK.  But, yes, dear hubby...it's pink.  Girly pink.  Titty pink.  Pink.  I love it.  We had three boys, they didn't wear pink.  We have a pink tiled bathroom (military must have found a good deal on these tiles)

Then my brain sends this idea...."Wouldn't it be cool to have little blingy spots randomly on the wall?"  It sounded so cool I agreed with the deranged boss.  BUT,  it neglected to tell me how to get the blingy spots on the wall!  I ruined 3 spray bottles trying to spray glitter on the wall, glitter clogs the spraying mechanism.  So I bought a can of spray glitter.  Used the whole can on the wall.......and it doesn't show.  Not even a twinkle.   So I came up with spreading watered down glue on the wall and then blowing the fine glitter gently on the wall.....

Sounded good but, didn't work.  So tried blowing chunkly glitter on to the glued wall...  The wood floors were beautiful, twinkling, glittery but, my wall wasn't.

By this time I was so fed up I fired the brain, dumped the glitter into the glue and slapped it on the wall randomly.

It glitters in spots......the spots that get the full light in between the painted spots on the globe.  Yeah....I painted the globe so it doesn't get the full light.

By this time I didn't care, sent the brain on vacation and slapped the glue-glitter on baseboards.

I kept the glitter off the baseboards and wall paper, wanted it to be seperate.  It definitely is blingy in spots, not exactly how I would have like it to be but......hey, that's the way my life is now.  OMG.....my brain is back from vac and it thinks I should have embossed gold designs on the wall !!!  Somebody save me.

White Walls...What was I thinking?

White walls....what was I thinking?  Clearly I wasn't....thinking.  Yes it goes with everything but, I can take it for so long (20 yrs) when I have to change it.  It's been painted several times but, always white.

I took the hall of horrors down recently, tried to wash fingerprints/smudges (grrr) off the superdupereasytowashbuymepaint and, after a near heart attack my brain gave me an idea.  The same brain that hasn't worked right since the stroke.....so why do I listen to it?  Because there's no one else home during the day.  My brain gets me into a lot of trouble.  It needs a babysitter or brain day care or.....shopping.

I use to be a big fan of wallpaper and, would still be today if someone else put it up and took it down.  It looks nice but, it's a pain in the ass to put up/take down and get the paste off the walls.  (Panelling is sounding better each day.  Slap it up, nail it, done.   NO FINGERPRINTS.    Of course, I couldn't go out while the hubby is at work and buy the pannelling, etc, etc because I'M NOT ALLOWED TO DRIVE).  I digress (is that the right word?  sometimes my brain likes to humiliate me)....Wallpaper, I don't like the mess but, I happen to have a large roll of commercial wallpaper I bought at a Habitat for Humanity store months ago.  Commercial wallpaper is heavier than the paper used in homes.

I bought a roll with a mauve background, no set pattern so you didn't have to match anything.  The space at the top is for a collage I'm working on.  I put up some of the family pictures but, left a lot off.  The hubby and I are in the middle, my family pics to the right, his to the left.

You can see the beginning of the other hall.....that will be in another post.

The plaid hat was the hubby's step-father's, seen in the photo above it.  He's also wearing a button that says "I HATE CATS" in the photo.   His father's photo is on the left.  The background looks like a light pink but, it's mauve/dark pink/whatever.

 This is the plaque given to the hubby's SF on retirement.....  My tombstone will probably read KMA (kiss my ass)

 Here's the wallpaper.  How did I get it up all by myself, without paste?  I can't believe I'm telling the whole world this...promise you won't tell anybody..

 I stapled it up then used a paint pen to cover the staple.  This is an extreme close up, you can't see them unless you really look for it.

And the border?

Yup, stapled that up too then used a marker.  When I get tired of it I'll pull it down and paint.  I hope to be healthier by then and DRIVING!  The paint will fill in all the little pin holes the staples made and I'm ready for the next brain crazed theme.  It's a lot easier with 2 people.  Didn't quite finish by the time the hubby came home and he helped with the rest but, he admitted it looked good.  Told the Dr what I had done and that it looked good so I have professional proof that he liked it.

More brain crazy ideas next week.

(Not responsible for wrong words, bad grammar/punctuations, etc)

Repetitious Cleaning Wears Me Out.....

Repetitious cleaning wears me out......especially fingerprints/smudges and light fixtures that become bug cemeteries.  So I decided to 'FIX' these area problems in my own little crazy, artsy way.  Of course I 'fixed' most of them while hubby was at work so he couldn't nix the ideas

First- Bug Cemeteries, otherwise known as Ceiling Lights. 

Sorry to say I did not take a before pic of the bug cemetary, it was way too creepy.  Usually I have to ask the hubby to clean the light because I'm not allowed on ladders (balance/dizzy/seizure issues).  So like a good wife I wait till he goes to work and drag the ladder out.  We have two long halls with 3 globe lights, my choice at the time but, I think I must have been high at the time to pick a clear globe which necessitates buying clear light bulbs.   I looked at track lighting briefly recently and, when the shock wore off decided I could live with the bug cemetaries.  Until I had to clean them again.

My brain must be on the road to recovery from the stroke or I am definitely going off the deep end.  My brain sent the idea of painting flowers on the globes to hide the bugs.  It took awhile to filter through and decifer but once it did it grew like the Grinch's heart.  I used Plaid's Enamel paints.  I haven't worked with them in years so it was difficult at first.  You have to let the first coat DRY completely or you end up removing it when you brush on the second coat.

Of course, nothing went smoothly because that's just the way my life is.  It's the truth, substantiated (wow! my brain remembered the word and how to spell it!) by many factual accounts.

The flower or the leaves were not suppose to be that big, according to the pic my brain was telling me but, it will have to deal with it.  They is what they is.

Try not to notice how crooked some are, tilt your head a little to the right and it's perfect.  Notice that the petals are white.....

Because they don't look it here.  Which means I could've used any color....

Looking up.  On the whole I am pleased with them.  I have to be....that paint is baked on and won't come off.  Come on bugs....give the new cemetary a try.  Want to see if your dead, curled up bodies show up through the paint.

(Not responsible for any mistakes, blame it on the brain  It gets confused easily.)